Hindu Dilemma

So Nandita Das makes a film called Firaaq. The critics argue that it is not a depiction of atrocities committed against Indian Muslims – it is rather about atrocities committed against humanity. As I read Nikhat Kazmi in Times of India and the terse commentary of the film that narrates how the Muslims might have fared through after Gujarat riots, I cant help wondering how might the Hindus have felt mentally, when an entire bogie was burnt down? I mean that was the start of the issue, right? What higher reason of societal reconciliation might have prompted it? Why doesn’t anyone make a film on that? There is always a cause to an effect. Normally that is what thinkers all over the world ponder on. But no sir, not in India. We are different.

We are always on a year long trip to pacify the so-called minority sentiment. For a change of taste, we might want to think about how might the Hindus have felt when they were slaughtered in thousands across Kashmir valley? When they were forced to flee their land that was inherently theirs to begin with, even before the 5th to 7th century conversions started? Any takers for a small film on the same? Sadly, none.

Hey, I am not a BJP fan by the way. In fact I am nobody’s fan. I have seen the bitterest of political rivals share the same drink in posh Banquets, evening after evening. So this is not some BJP propaganda before the impending elections. This is a simple Indian question. Why are Hindus demonized always? By anyone, from a street-peddler to an intellectual. And all of them get away. Because Hindus don’t strike back? They don’t take out Fatwas, or demand the head of the offender? Nice fun eh? If they do, they will be branded as a terrorist community. If they don’t, sudden-intellectuals like Ms. Das would keep popping up from nowhere and take pride in narrating half cooked and partially blind views.

Damned if you do and damned if you don’t.

Changing Language

The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational once again asked readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting or changing one letter, and supply a new definition. Here are this year's winners. Read them carefully. Each is an artificial word with only one letter altered from a real word. Some are terrifically innovative:
1. Intaxication: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until yourealize it was your money to start with.
2. Reintarnation: Coming back to life as a hillbilly.
3. Bozone (n.): The substance surrounding stupid people, that stops bright ideas from penetrating. The Bozone layer, unfortunately, shows little sign of breaking down in the near future.
4. Cashtration (n.): The act of buying a house, which renders the subject financially impotent for an indefinite period of time.
5. Giraffiti: Vandalism spray-painted very, very high.
6. Sarchasm: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.
7. Inoculatte: To take coffee intravenously when you are running late.
8. Hipatitis: Terminal coolness.
9. Osteopornosis: A degenerate disease (This one got extra credit)
10. Karmageddon: It's like, when everybody is sending off all these really bad vibes, right? And then like, the Earth explodes and it's like, a serious bummer.
11. Decafalon (n.): The grueling event of getting through the day consuming only things that are good for you.
12. Glibido: All talk and no action.
13. Dopeler Effect: The tendency of stupid ideas to seem smarter when they come at you rapidly.
14. Arachnoleptic Fit (n.): The frantic dance performed just after you've accidentally walked through a spider web.
15. Beelzebug (n.): Satan in the form of a mosquito, that gets into your bedroom at three in the morning and cannot be cast out.
16. Caterpallor (n.): The color you turn after finding half a worm in the fruit you're eating.
17. Ignoranus: A person who's both stupid and an asshole.

Its Holi…!

We were on a trip to Delhi from Dubai during Holi last year. Loved the way the residents of Nil Block, Malviya Nagar celebrated it. In hindsight, this was one of those rare few things that I liked about Delhi. For starters, they played with dry colors. ‘Played’ would indeed be underplaying words – they literally powdered the whole block with Gulal. That included the occupants, even the toddlers. And before the child’s right activists here, holler, let me add that the kids enjoyed the whole affair. The Block Park teemed with the residents – they even managed to pull my wife, who is none-too-sporty about Holi colors, out. The color rampage went on for hours, and I apprehensive to begin with, enjoyed the day thoroughly after about 15 years – since the time I left my hometown. It was a landmark – my Holi intolerant wife got pepped up enough to promise to celebrate 2009 Holi the same style in our Cal housing.

And she pulled it off! Though South Delhi got scaled down easily by 75% in South Calcutta, considering her year-old fervor, it was a blockbuster. The celebrations finally concluded at 12 midnight, inclusive with the usual rounds of drinks that Holi is incomplete without.

Here’s hoping that you all enjoyed the day as much as we did.

THE RECESSION STORY – as told by Subhamoy, Unilever

This Story is about a man who once upon a time was selling Hotdogs by the roadside. He was illiterate, so he never read newspapers. He was hard of hearing, so he never listened to the radio. His eyes were weak, so he never watched television. But enthusiastically, he sold lots of hotdogs. He was smart enough to offer some attractive schemes to increase his sales. His sales and profit went up.He ordered more a more raw material and buns and use to sale more. He recruited few more supporting staff to serve more customers. He started offering home deliveries. Eventually he got himself a bigger and better stove. As his business was growing, the son, who had recently graduated from College, joined his father. Then something strange happened.
The son asked, "Dad, aren't you aware of the great recession that is coming our way?"The father replied, "No, but tell me about it." The son said, "The international situation is terrible. The domestic situation is even worse. We should be prepared for the coming bad times."The man thought that since his son had been to college, read the papers, listened to the radio and watched TV, he ought to know and his advice should not be taken lightly.So the next day onwards, the father cut down the his raw material order and buns, took down the colorful signboard, removed all the special schemes he was offering to the customers and was no longer as enthusiastic. He reduced his staff strength by giving layoffs. Very soon, fewer and fewer people bothered to stop at his hotdog stand. And his sales started coming down rapidly, same is the profit.The father said to his son, "Son, you were right: We are in the middle of a recession and crisis. I am glad you warned me ahead of time."

Moral of the Story: It's all in your MIND! Don’t confuse intelligence with good judgment. There are many walking encyclopedias that are living failures.